so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize