Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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