its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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