Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
