Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
