I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
