im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
