you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Two words: blizzard sex
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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