No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
You've changed since you got that strap on
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
