You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
