You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
