reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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