Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
i out mim tonsoeep
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