Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
