so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
My penis needs a shock collar
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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