is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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