New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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