Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
