Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
