maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
