Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize