Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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