OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
