So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
