love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
