But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
