the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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