Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Drunk is not a location!
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The Olympian is in my bed
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
