His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Randomize
