had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
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