Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
