btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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