He disabled his match.com account in front of me
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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