you guys were way drunker than both of me
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
