Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Im just a social blackout drinker.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
