he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
