i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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