we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
