well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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