no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
