He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
