please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Bring me that man meat
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
