she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize
