At least make sure they are 18
Why
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
