i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
