I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
