this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
God I need to hump something, right now.
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