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• (925): View more from California

  I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.

  Fav 10 2450 941

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day

  Fav 35 5234 1987

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.

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• (516): View more from New York

  good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.

  Fav 5 930 1395

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I'm so there

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.

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• (818): View more from California

  It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket

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• (801): View more from Utah

  He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?

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