I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize
