Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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